No Dad Needs a Paper Weight: The Worst Father’s Day Gifts

posted on May 7, 2014 at 1:28 pm

Gift giving can be a trial and error process, both as a child and a parent. Children want to buy a tie for dad who doesn’t wear a suit for work. Parents want to get for their spouse from their child that is useful, perhaps bookends for some undetermined purpose, since the last book they read was assigned in high-school. You know the saying, it’s the thought that counts? Sure that’s true, however no Dad needs a paper weight – the worst Father’s Day gifts.

 

1. “Macho Man” Randy Savage: Be a Man Rap Album

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

For the devoted wrestling fan.

 

2. Horse Head Mask

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight  The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

Now Dad can perform those Godfather re-enactments with this incredibly disturbing, realistic horse head.

 

3. Talking Toilet Paper Spindle

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight  The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

That’s what everyone wants when they are using the bathroom, commentary.

 

4. A Christmas Story Leg Lamp

 

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

It’s a major award!!! Even comes with its own FRAGILE (pronounced fra-geel-ay) box.

 

5. Unicorn Meat

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight  The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

Tastes like chicken. If Dad has a more refined palate, try the Dragon Meat instead.

 

6. Chocolate Covered Edible Bugs

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

For an after dinner snack.

 

7. Edgar Allan Poe Action Figure

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

 

Poe was known for his fighting skills. GI Joe has got nothin’ on him.

 

 8. QUE Cologne

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

Barbecue scented cologne. Nothing more needs to be said.

 

9. Forest Face

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

I always feel like somebody’s watching me.

 

10.  Toothpaste Tube Wringer

No Dad Needs a Paper Weight - The Worst Fathers Day Gifts

Toothpaste shouldn’t need a tool.

 

11. Man Candles

 

Now in Riding Mower, MMM Bacon, and Man Town.


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