The Nerve! Elementary School Teachers Refuse Drug Test After Heroin Is Found in Staff Bathroom

posted on March 18, 2014 at 2:39 am

You might remember elementary school as a fun time of recess adventures and avoiding boys because they had cooties and that was really icky. You spent your days learning cursive, completing homework assignments, and praying every day was a movie day. Your favorite class was coloring, because coloring is freaking awesome.

Teacher Refuse Drug Test

Most likely (I mean… hopefully), the last thing on your mind was drugs. As a young kid, you might not have even known what drugs were. For you, coloring was the strongest and most palpable aphrodisiac in the universe. Coloring, and those days of gym class when your teacher got out that huge parachute and let you play with it. You got so high off life.

Teachers Refuse Drug Test

Unfortunately, some teachers at the Benjamin Cosor Elementary School in Fallsburg, New York have taken it upon themselves to risk this carefree and happy lifestyle of many of their students. Instead of teaching their kids about the joy of coloring and letting them play with the big parachute, they were caught doing heroin.

Teachers Refuse Drug Test

That’s right. Police say heroin and several needles were found in the men’s faculty bathroom, which children don’t have access to (so there’s no placing blame on some eight-year-old kid). Using footage from security cameras, they were able to narrow it to six different teachers that had used the bathroom before the drugs and paraphernalia were discovered.

Thinking that they had the perpetrator (or perpetrators) cornered, administrators requested that each suspect take a drug test to rule out their involvement and catch the druggie red-handed. Initially, the teachers agreed. However, after a meeting with a lawyer hired by the teachers’ union, all but one of the teachers refused to take the test.

Teachers Refuse Drug Test
Yeah – except getting caught and sent to jail! –

While the teachers have a legal right to abstain from the drug test, it does make you wonder… what are they trying to hide? Are they so loyal that they are reluctant to give up their corrupt peer? Or maybe… they’re all part of some underground teacher drug ring! Come on, we’ve all seen Breaking Bad… do we have the next Walter White on our hands? Imagine – an elementary school teacher has been pushed too far by his sniveling little third graders and needs to find a more intense release…

Teachers Refuse Drug Test
Or in this case, heroin. Featured in the upcoming series, Breaking Bad 2. –

Ok, maybe that’s a bit of a far out theory. But even so – these teachers are up to something naughty. They are putting their students’ lives and well-beings at risk by taking their illegal habit to work. And by by preventing the investigation from moving forward, they are continuing to risk their students’ safety. Here’s to hoping the police can find another way to crack the case, maybe by bringing in a psychic.

Teachers Refuse Drug Test

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